I am very quiet tonight, in fact I have been very quiet all day. I am trying to process life right now. Hard things have happened, there will be no family Thanksgiving tomorrow, I will be here with the pugs, and I am offering all the support that I can, and, well, I can’t really talk about it but it is a hard, sad time. I am okay personally, but one very dear to me is not. This, too, is life, and it would be a terribly hard time any time, but seems harder and sadder right now as we just start into the holiday season. I have been sitting with this all day. I want so badly to wave a magic wand and make everything okay but I can’t. Seeing someone you love suffer is unbearable, you would take it on for them if you could but you can’t. I can just be here, day by day, and do what I can, and sometimes that is just a phone call and sometimes texting and often through the last week my dear one has been here with me. This is life right now. It’s hard to search for happiness when the one you love is heartbroken and devastated. Right now I am searching for a way to bring as much gentleness and peace to the situation as I can. That will have to be enough.
We want to make everything alright for those we love but sometimes we just have to sit, silently, and wait. Be ready to be there for them at a moment’s notice, day or night, and hold the space for their suffering. Right now I am holding the space.
I hope that you are well tonight dear one, I hope if you celebrate Thanksgiving tomorrow it will be all that you dreamed of, and if you are alone I hope that you find something in your day to bring you moments of peace, and ease, and a little happiness where you can find it.
I am here, right now, looking out the window on this dark November night, wondering when the light will come again. These days the darkness comes early and lasts long. Spring is far away.
I will close the windows now, draw the pugs close, and find something to pass the time. This, too, shall pass.
The Experiment ~A 365 Day Search For Truth, Beauty &
Happiness: Day 1 ~ Introduction To The Project
“Do or do not. There is no try.”
Yoda
