Oy Vey. If Rachel had not been with me today I wouldn’t have made it. She went with me to Social Security and it took a LONG time. THEN, having had to run into the bathroom and get sick just when they called us into our appointment after a LONG wait, we sat opposite a woman with some kind of bulletproof partition between us as if we were there to try to shoot her. After our appointment I could understand why.
At the beginning she said in no uncertain terms (I had a whole folder of paperwork with me, I brought every conceivable thing I could think of that they might need) that we were NOT to talk or ask questions or try to give her anything until she was ready for it, just to answer yes or no to the three thousand or so questions she was asking, and if we would periodically forget because it had gotten so confusing she would actually STAND UP, cup her ears, and say, glaring at us, “Just use these.” Inotherwords, “shut up and just listen.” This lady was terrifying.
And nothing turned out like I thought it was supposed to. 5 years ago when I went to the social security office I was given a breakdown of numbers, i.e. if I started drawing social security at 63 I would get one amount a month but if I waited until 64 I would get more and on up the line until I hit 66 when I would get the most money. I decided then to wait until I was 66 which isn’t for another year BUT it seems that is not an option for me. Because in my life I have been very unwell a lot of the time and not able to hold a job outside the home (I tried, I promise you, which led to breakdowns, hospitalizations, and more that I won’t bore you with.) I don’t have a work history of accruing my social security benefits so I get them through some spousal program which I’ve already forgotten the name of but which I kind of knew about in a sort of way that wasn’t particularly helpful today. I was married for 31 years and my benefits come through my ex-husband somehow or other which is called the thing I can’t remember and all the paperwork we (or rather, SHE) filled out today will get mailed to me and then, in a few days, I have to go to social services because my income is so low there really is no money to PAY for medicare. I have already, apparently, been approved for medicaid which I didn’t know or understand and what that means is that Medicare pays about 80% of whatever and when your income is as low as mine and you qualify for Medicaid it picks up what Medicare doesn’t, if I’m undertstanding correctly? and they pay the fee that would have been taken out of my social security check for Medicare.
By this point I was a wreck, thought I might have to run to the bathroom again and I think I must have looked just EXACTLY like the lady at the top of this post because Rachel kept patting me and asking me if I was okay.
THEN when Rachel and I finally made it out to the car my phone rang and I didn’t answer. If I don’t recognize the phone number I let it go to voicemail and check it later. If they don’t leave a legitimate voicemail I know it was just one more bogus spam call and I block them but this was Social Services. I thought “Oh Lordy we barely made it out of Social Security and Social Services (Where I have to make an appt. to deal with the Medicaid part) is already calling? Oh they were calling alright but not about the Medicaid. It was about my Food Stamp benefits which have to get renewed yearly and while they are always nice on the phone I am always afraid and it is humilating. I am incredibly grateful for the help and while I don’t get a lot of food stamp money what I do get helps me. So I had to leave Social Security, make arrangements with Social Services to talk to them about Medicaid, and before I even made it out of the parking lot at Social Security Social Services was calling me about my Food Stamp renewal/interview.
I don’t feel well. I really don’t. It was too much in one day and my few remaining elderly brain cells are fried. I took a nap with Molly and woke up at 7 all discombobulated, afraid, confused, and somewhat bereft.
I don’t mind getting old but the paperwork will kill you.
Oh my G-d do I feel your pain. I spent all last week dealing with my retirement people and SS. They were all so very kind as blow aftwr blow came with more bad news. I was told I do not get SS which is fine but neither do I get any Medicare paid for. So I am going from no cost for insurance to a huge bill. It is overwhelming when dealing with all the government beuracracy . I feel your pain. So glad your daughter was there for support. They make it so difficult for anyone to succeed.
Oh Lauren honey I’m so sorry, it’s all so hard and confusing, And I’ll tell you what, I know that I get benefits today that a lot of people badly need and would qualify for but they don’t even know it’s there. After my house burned down and I lost everything including any financial security I had I was so lost and in such bad shape I don’t know how I was able to survive but Rachel stepped up, stepped in, took charge, became my financial power of attorney and searched for and found, through colleagues, how to get what I needed and how to go about it and it saved me. One government program pays for my therapy and med management, I qualified for the low end of the sliding scale at the clinic and I was so afraid to go there, I had to give up all my doctors, dentist, etc that I’d have for over 20 years and go to the low income clinic and they even have a dentist there. I get the services I need, nothing glamorous, no pretty shiny offices, but I have been able to get what I need and I wouldn’t even have known how to go about getting any of it, and Medicare and all the rest have been a nightmare, so yes, I know, and I understand, and I’m so sorry. Tonight I’m just flat out, about to get off the computer and watch Netflix snuggled up with Molly. That’s all I’m good for right now. I will hold you in my heart and prayers. We need all the help we can get right now!
Amen
I love you Lauren, hold my hand, we’ll get through this somehow. I just want to be on the other side of it all!
Oh Maitri, why does everything have to be so hard and confusing? I think of all those close to me that paid into Social Security and passed away in there 50’s they never got a dime and yet where did all that money go???
Social Security use to be the richest in the world until they started borrowing from it for everything under the Sun.
I really believe they make it hard on us so that we just give up, not a choice for you or me.
Hang in there and demand you be taken care of and get every penny you can.
Sorry you are having a hard time. I took mine earlier as who knows what is ahead. Was smart on my part but each situation is different.
Wishing you hugs and Blessings that it all works out.
I am down for the second time in 3 months with a Gout attack not able to bare weight on my left foot and lots and lots of pain. Today, I feel like giving up really truly I am tired. Alone I can’t get out in this condition and I really don’t know anyone here in town so feeling very alone. Hugs to you.. 🤗 jim
Oh Jim honey I am so sorry that you are having such a hard time. I will hold you close in my heart and prayers that you may heal soon and well, and know you are in my heart always…
And hugs right back to you…
Love,
Maitri
Dearest Maitri… oh my what a nasty lady and what an even nasier experience you had with her… makes me wonder how the hell some people hold down a job with such poor interpersonal skills…. no wonder she is in human resources… that sort of a job and personally requires no empathy or consideration for others (apologies no offence to hunsn resource people)…
I wish the paperwork stack was all about getting old… but it isn’t unfortunately… my son turned 18 two weeks ago and finished school (year 11) almost 14 weeks ago and the paperwork shuffle is now so repetitive and annoying that even my pen stopped writing snd had to be swapped out twice.
I know a few people right niw in the midst of a paperwork weigh down… i have to say that if we were nit truly needing help i would far rather go through life without needing any medical assistance for myself or my son.
Chin up hey and find the oeace within you to breathe as the shuffle of paperwork will come to a hault.
Thank goodness for the beautiful soul your daughter is… find comfort in her Maitri she sounds like she is a great support to you.
Feel better soon xx
Thank you so much dear Tanya. It is indeed a muck and a muddle. I’m so sorry you are having to deal with all this mess for your son too. I will hold you in my heart and prayers and pray that you get a good resolution with his case. Love and blessings to you and your whole family…
this sounds like the worst nightmare!!! that woman should be fired, immediately!
i have no memory of how i got social security or got on medicare. my husband tom must have helped, or i had decent, caring people help me navigate, or both. it felt seamless. being on tom’s health insurance has been a blessing. i am privileged, obviously, not having to navigate this maze of bureaucratic craziness. i reach out and hug you. tomorrow will be a new day, sweetheart. maisie and daisy are waiting for your brush!!!
xo
ka
Oh Katya, it was a nightmare indeed. I don’t want to leave the house again today but I have no choice, this is my therapy day and I really need it. But I only have to leave for an hour and a half, therapy and the drive back and forth, and then Molly and I are going to plant some things and water everything in my little pot garden, and then Rachel is coming over this evening and I will make us a good dinner and we will visit and maybe watch a movie. It makes me so happy when she is here. And yes, Maisie and Daisy are my salvation. I’m anxious to get going on the new drawing and I know what it will be but these days have been so long. Soon…
M. xoxox
Yes, the Medicaid will pick up what Medicare does not. Looks like you’re going to be Medi-Medi, so you are going to be golden.
The Queen Mother and I are still waiting for word from the DMV to see if I can get her off income-based Medi-Cal (the California version of Medicaid) and onto a program that isn’t income based.
Sometimes I agree with Jim: it feels like they make it difficult on purpose so folks will give up, or not even try. I don’t even know if Social Security will even exist in 20 years or so, thanks to government greed and ineptitude.
Time to stop before the claws come out!
Take all the time you need to recover from traveling the bureaucratic maze. :p
Thank you so much dear Victoria, I know you have been through so much with your mother and your husband and paperwork out the wazzoo and bureaucracy. It will surely wear a body down. Today I am just raggedy and bone weary but I have to go to therapy today and I need it. I will just bear in mind what writer Anne Lamott says to do during trying times. “Left foot, right foor, left food, b-r-e-a-t-h-e…..” That’s all one can really do isn’t it. One day, one step at a time. Onward we go sister!
There are people who love this sort of job that gives them power over their customers. They know that the poor and old are too afraid to fight back, because they might withhold information or money by their power.
A pity those few who work in that field to help and guide so often burn out.
I’m so glad Rachel was with you! Sometimes it helps to have a second person, if only to witness and remember.
Fight the good fight, you will in the end get whatever social services are out there to help you. It just makes me so angry, how much you have to go through on the way!
Sending lots of love and hugs
Silke
Thank you for your love and support dear Silke. It has indeed been a trial but all one can do is shoulder on, and Rachel is my ballast in the storm, thank God.
Off to therapy now!
Well, I paid in to SS so I get a small amount that pays for Medicare but I don’t get the full amount I WOULD have been entitled to because I have a Federal pension. My pension is for 25 years of service at age 50 when my agency was dissolved.
Furthermore, it is prohibited by law to double-dip as it’s called, despite my having earned all the quarters required. Does that make sense? It really aggravates me when some big Poobah decides to change Medicare and Medicaid. The agency I worked for wrote a Report to the Congressin about 1985 about the perils of messing about with the SS, such as “borrowing” money and not repaying it.
It’s all so complex, isn’t it Marge? I’m glad you have yours sorted out. Please say a prayer for me…
Sending hugs Maitri. Rachel is a star, she really is. Well done for getting through all of that. What an ordeal. xxx
Thank you so much dear Jenny, hugs received and very much appreciated and yes, Rachel is my angel. I couldn’t manage any of this without her. An ordeal indeed…
Daughters are a blessing and I see that in Rachel. Let her be your advocate with these bureaucratic bullies. It will all be fine, enjoy the beautiful spring weather.
Thank you so much dear Lisa and yes, Rachel is an angel and a blessing indeed. Thank you for your kind supportive thoughts. I’m off to therapy now.
How awful to have to deal with cruel bureaucrats just when you most need some compassionate understanding. Thank you, Rachel, for being such a kind and helpful advocate for Maitri.
Thank you so much sweet Cathryn and yes, Rachel is my angel, I couldn’t do any of this without her. I hope you have a blessed day…
Oh yes I feel your pain. Life is supposed to get simpler when you get older, unfortunately, it’s getting more stressful, more paperwork to fill in and on and on……at our time we need more energy to cope with normal life stuff not all this rubbish. And the establishment makes more rules for us to follow. Heaven help us all. Please look after yourself.
Positive love……
Olive😢😢😢💖💋
Thank you so much dear Olive, and you are so right. Sigh… But it is what it is and nothing to do but slog through it. But I tell you, I wouldn’t be making is without my daughter Rachel going with me, and being my advocate. People need an advocate going through this process if they are alone I tell ya!
On we go, and I wish you peace and ease and gentleness through all the stacks of paperwork!
Love,
Maitri
Dear Maitri, I was so angry and upset for you and all of us when I read this yesterday I just didn’t have the words to reply. I don’t know how people can sleep at night treating others the way they do. I am so sorry you had to go through this. So very sorry for the type of system that causes this. It is so unnecessary if there was humanity involved.
Oh Jean, I tell you, it can be brutal. And the ones hit hardest are those of us who are poor, elderly, and so on, the most vulnerable members of society. It seems that sometimes the meanest people are there to work with those of us who are vulnerable. Now I have to say I have met a number of very kind souls as well, but Monday was a nightmare and it’s hit me hard all week.
I hope you are doing well sweet Jean. May you be blessed…
I’m so glad you have Rachel to help, and qualifying for Medicaid is good, too-since Medicare is a-pay-in program. Hopefully, the SS income will help a but now, too.
Sending all good wishes.
Thank you Lisa, I don’t know what I’d so without Rachel, she is my angel…