On Becoming A “Can Do” Girl…


“Darby was “tickled pink” about her new pink hair. She had wanted to go pink for a long time and finally decided it was now or never. She got it cut in a bob and dyed the color of cotton candy and it made her feel happy all over. She had lately come to the conclusion, when reading an article about the fact that on their deathbeds the dying don’t regret what they DID do but what they DIDN’T, that there was no time to waste. If she really wanted to do something and it was in her power to do so she was going to do it. She started thinking of all the things she really wanted to do and pondered over the reasons why she had never done them. Mostly her excuses ran to not having the time or money, but when she really examined the things her heart longed to do almost everything that she REALLY wanted to do was within reach. She wanted to go roller skating again, she wanted to ride a horse again, she wanted to take cooking lessons and become a really good cook, things like that, and every one of those things was something she could do if she really got up the gumption. She just needed a CAN DO attitude and a little bit of gumption and she could do it. People usually said things like travel the world, jump out of an airplane, go to the moon! But in the end most folks desires were simpler than that and more in reach than they’d imagined. What if it was contacting a long lost friend? What’s the worst that could happen? They could hang up on you or perhaps they don’t want to talk to you and then you’d know and be able to really let it go, but chances are it would go a lot better than you’d think it would. Time heals all kind of things. Anyway, it was with this attitude that Darby went into the salon and got her hair cut and dyed and she just couldn’t be happier. What would she do next? Heck, the roller skating rink. She was going and nothing could stop her. If she fell down she’d get up and keep going. She was going to be a Can Do Girl, and no one could stop her. There was just no telling how her life would change with this new attitude but it would end up taking her farther than she had ever dreamed…”

I didn’t realize when I started The 100 Ladies Project just how much these Ladies would teach me. I now have a daily practice of drawing and painting one Lady a day and writing her story and today it was Darby with the pink hair. And as I wrote her story so much came up for me. And I realized that I, too, want to become a “Can Do Girl”. If not, why not? If not now, when? I am 62 and there’s no time like the present!

Like Darby and most people I have not done things that I hold in my heart because so many of them seem faraway, out of reach, not possible because they are too expensive or I don’t have the time. What have any of us got but time? No matter what is going on in your life somewhere there is time. If you have to plan for it then start planning!

I have had dreams in my life of things like living in France. Well, that’s just not going to happen, but is it what is in my deepest heart today anyway? No. What kind of things are in my deepest heart? One that comes immediately to mind, and you will laugh, is keeping a clean house. I have always been a disaster of a housekeeper. And I’m not talking about having things so crazy clean you could eat off the floor. (With 4 pugs the likelihood that that will happen is slim to none, but THEY can eat off the floor, and do!) No, I am talking about things much simpler. Having a house that is tidy and clean enough. I can do that. I am learning to do that. A couple of days ago I got weeks worth of laundry finally all put away. Yesterday I put up my Christmas tree and cleaned in my studio. Baby steps, but steps. And Darby wants to ride a horse again. Me, I just want to BE with horses. I want to smell the smell of the barn, bury my nose in a horses neck to smell their wonderful smell. And you know what? I’m betting that somewhere in this town there are stables that would let me visit and smell the wonderful smell and love on a horse. I bet it exists right here in this town.

And I, like Darby, have dreamed of taking cooking lessons and becoming a great cook. Now I don’t want to be a chef in a fine restaurant and I have already started to realize this dream by cooking every week with Noni. I have learned so much from her already and I will continue to learn more. Currently I wouldn’t be able to accomplish what we do together, alone, having Noni here to cook with is like riding a bike with training wheels. I’m not ready to take them off. But I am getting the gumption to cook with training wheels on even when I’m alone by doing the things Noni is teaching me along the way and it feels grand. I am already doing things now that I wasn’t doing this time last year. And my friendship with Noni and our time together is something that I treasure. It was a big leap to ask her, last July, if she would like to come over and cook with me one Saturday night. Now we cook together every weekend and that has blossomed into spending much of the weekend together. We just yesterday talked about how lonely we used to be on the weekends. You can make things happen in your life that you dream of, you just have to try.

And I want to lose all the weight that I need to lose. Finally. Once and for all. This is scary but in 2016 to date I lost 30 pounds on my own and 30 pounds so far with Weight Watchers. I still have a good way to go but I am doing it. If I get all of my weight off who knows, I might just ride a horse again myself!

And my Ladies. I don’t yet know exactly what direction they are headed but I believe it will be some kind of book. I am going to say now that I believe in this next year it will be revealed to me what the Ladies are supposed to do, what form they will take. And if I don’t finish the book I believe I will get it started and make good headway with it. And I would like to teach ecourses. I am starting to see a way that that might manifest. I think this next year I will find my way.

If not, why not? If not now, when? Darby isn’t waiting anymore and neither am I. There’s no time like the present. I don’t want to get to the end of my life with regrets about the things I didn’t do. If it is within my power I am going to do those things and I am going to begin now. It is, most definitely, time.

Let’s go friends! What are you waiting for?


If you enjoy this blog a donation would be deeply appreciated to help me continue to bring “Maitri’s Heart” to you. Thank you, and many deep blessings to one and all…


  1. I love Darby’s “write up.” These ladies are definitely characters that are talking
    to you, and thus, to us. What a wonderful project! Wish you could be here
    tonight to help us make mini pizzas — with fresh greens from the garden

    you’ve lost more than 30 lbs? wow. drawing the ladies must just let the extra
    cushioning melt away

    • Thank you darling Ka,

      The Ladies are surely talking to me, listening to me, teaching me things, bringing peace to my heart. And yes, I am losing weight, and it is good.

      Love you honey, your mini pizzas sound wonderful!


  2. Maitri,
    I love this piece. We do need to step forward and do it now. The time is there. Thanks for the nudge from the Ladies.

    And kudos on your cooking adventures!


    • Thank you so much Lisa honey, I really appreciate that and I agree. And thank you, the cooking with Noni has been one of the great gifts of 2016… 🙂

  3. I love the ladies. I identify with some more than others. Either by their look or their story. They are becoming my “foster” sisters, and with some I continue the conversation. At times they give me the courage to push through things just by their attitude. They give me the little oomp that I need from time to time. Whatever your ladies decide to evolve into whether a book (I’ll buy it) or a class…sign me up…..I’m in! Congrats on all the weight loss, that’s a Wowzer….way to go!

    • Thank you so much Terri, you just don’t know how much that means to me honey. The Ladies send you their love, and so do I… 🙂

  4. I like a really clean house too, and also am not a housekeeper, never have aspired to be. Just like things tidy and not filthy, ya know! Flylady.com has some excellent tips that have helped me a lot: namely, make my bed the moment I get out of it, and get dressed/washed/breakfast done to the point where I’d be ready to go out the door for the day. These two things alone had a huge impact on the way my days went. – Kathy

Leave a Comment