The Book Process, My Whole New Way Of Living and Being With My Art and In My Life, and What I Mean By “Memoir”…

Oh what a time it is. Revelation after revelation after revelation. It is as though my life, my writing and art, all the bits and parts and pieces of it all, are like a single lotus flower whose thousand petals are opening faster and faster and I marvel at how I never realized how much they were all of a piece, all a single flower, with its many-faceted crystalline nature, like a single quartz crystal, shimmering and shining in myriad ways as you hold it in your hand, hold it up to the sun, look deeply into its moonstruck nature in the dark of night, and yet still, a single crystal. We human beings are discovering our crystalline nature, if we allow it, with the changing of the world and Nature all around us, the edges are blurred, perhaps we are heading, in this new Aquarian Age, to the place where we will finally realize that we truly are “all one.” We’ve a long way to go for sure, but I am experiencing an awakening deep inside, and I am hopeful that just this is possible.

As I work on this book a few things have quickly become apparent. I redid the cover to exclude “Part 1.” It is a single book and as such, for ease for you, my dear Patrons, as my readers on the journey, and having already given you the front pages of the book including the introduction, I will send you a PDF of each chapter as it is finished which will mean it won’t take you long to read and you won’t have to digest so much at once. Better to send a few pages at once, and not 100! Also this is a book that is meant to be experienced, not breezed through, each page slowly and lovingly crafted, a visual experience, not just words on paper, nor is it like a graphic novel to be read like a comic book, it is designed to encourage the reader to slow down and let the story, as it unfolds, perhaps bring up memories of your own. I am very excited to share it with you in this way, and between the whole chapters sent as PDF’s there will be many posts on how I am creating this book, tools, computer programs, art, and the method I have devised to help in the creation of this book which I am also excited to share with you.

As to my “whole new way of living and being” I realized almost in a lightning bolt flashing through my mind kind of way that I have been trying so hard, for so many years, to “live in the moment,” having practiced, taught, studied, and mentored people in doing mindfulness, but now for me what it all comes down to is this, not mindfulness, but going with the flow. Those of you who have been here with me since the beginning of my Patreon journey have seen just this. I started with a fixed idea of what this should all mean, and how I should do it, and what I should present but it all kept shapeshifting, and I felt guilty, and I tried to make it be a certain way, and it just couldn’t be, but it has all, every single bit of it, brought me to this place, this book, the one I have been trying for years to write, and it will include the writing, some art, graphic images and backgrounds, and so much more, and it will be exactly what it was always supposed to be. And it was only able to happen when I stopped trying to make it all BE something and just let it come as it would naturally, unfolding slowly and gently along the way.

Go with the flow.

Go with the flow.

Go with the flow. 

That is how I am writing this book, I am going with the flow, and in doing so the bits and parts and pieces I need to craft the book will show up along the way in the right and proper order and just when needed. I have begun to trust this and it is, truly, a rather glorious thing.

And then I have come to a realization about what “memoir” is to me and I thought it might be worth sharing. And I know full well that everyone who writes one has their own definition in mind when setting out on the journey. Mine is most likely a tad different, but fitting for me and my book. Here’s what I wrote in my journal today as I was musing about just this…

“No one’s memory is completely accurate and it becomes less so with time, but I believe it is all absolutely true and, as wine that has aged over time has a new softness, and ripeness, is more flavorful, full-bodied and delicious, so, too, our memories have greater depth and instead of the pencil-sharp marks of a moment when it is being lived our lives, our memories, can become like watercolors if we allow it. Things that we need to let go of to be whole and happy and to enjoy the life we have today just as it is become so transparent they are barely a shadow in the picture. If we, as the artists of our own lives, decide to hold onto distant painful memories they take on a greater import than they should or need to and rather than merely a pentimento, they remain bold images that distort the present reality of our lives, never allowing us to be at peace. That will not do us any good. Let the colors fade, and what remains is the true story of our lives. It is in this way that I am approaching the writing of my book.”

I am making this a public post in the hopes that more may join us on what I believe will be a very exciting journey. We are working together, you and I, and I am able to do this work because of your generous support. You are supporting my life being lived and my story being told. At this point I’m not sure which is the more important, but it all matters, and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

With so much love, always and always…