The Experiment: Day 120 ~ My Brain Is Changing And What Will That Mean?

Right now I’m listening to Beethoven…

I have been thinking about this all day. I couldn’t seem to write anything about it I was so busy researching and reading articles online. It has to do with the brain. My brain is changing significantly, on the ketogenic diet, and, as my brain continues to renew and regenerate itself in this whole new landscape when my body and brain are no longer fueled by glucose but now burn ketones for fuel instead, I am becoming a different person in ways I never dreamed possible. I still don’t understand what the implications will be, but I am a woman who, in three months, is not only significantly healthier, but who has now gone completely off the psych meds she was on for decades and can now honestly say that she is happier than she ever imagined she’d be. It doesn’t seem possible but it is, it works, and it is nothing short of miraculous. I recently shared, again, the article that got me into keto. It was not about weight loss which is surely a wonderful benefit. I went on the ketogenic diet to heal my brain, and it worked. I most especially love this article on Ketones And The Brain — and please, I encourage you to read this whole article, you will be forever changed. (I also love this amazing article on brain regeneration which is up to date and contains incredible information that most of us — and it would seem many doctors — don’t seem to know.) Okay, I wanted to put some of the science up front before I went on.

This is real life stuff, body, mind, and spirit. Right now I am on a rapid growth pattern with all three. I’m having a bit of a hard time keeping up with the changes. I think these marvelous images help show in pictures, instead of words, just what I am going through right now. Step out of the logical side of your brain for a few moments and just meditate on the one above and this one below. When I went on a search for images for this post I found them startling in their ability to express what I wanted to say.

Prior to going on the ketogenic diet I spent most of the last year in a state of dire despair. My lifetime struggle with clinical depression was nearly taking me down, anxiety kept me in a constant state of debilitating fear and while I was not suicidal as I had been in the past I was at the place where I truly didn’t see the way to go on and wasn’t sure how I could. I saw no future for myself, and I certainly didn’t see how anything could change for me. I’d had a lifetime of therapy and drugs, and I surely didn’t think a “diet” change would do anything. I’d tried them all and just got fatter and less healthy all the time. No, there was just no use. Until there was. I take pride in the fact that no matter how low I was, and for my whole life since I was a little girl, there was a little spark in me that finally wouldn’t give up. By the time I found the ketogenic diet I kind of fell into it. It was kind of a last ditch effort and I really didn’t hold out a lot of hope. But I committed myself to it and I went all in. And I’ve stayed all in and will continue to. As I’ve said numerous times here, I am keto for life.

That having been said — and I know I’ve said it a lot and will likely continue to because I have to share this with people, so very many people suffer — where I am now is kind of at this “Well, I did what I set out to do, now what do I do with this new brain of mine?” place. I mean there are many health reasons for staying on the ketogenic diet and I have a lot of weight to lose which I’m doing but I was not prepared to experience so many positive changes so quickly, and I wanted to be off my psych meds but I really didn’t know what that would mean? How it would alter the way that I live and have my being in the world? I look in the mirror now and there is someone else looking out of those eyes. It is more than physical. Our body houses the soul, the spirit, and when one thing changes everything changes.

I know what I’m about to say will be controversial for some, some won’t believe in what I’m about to say, and others will think “She better get back on those psych meds fast!” and that’s fine, I can surely laugh right along with you from a place of joyful knowing. Here goes.

From the time I was a little girl I was not only a very sensitive child but I had, well, the ability to see and hear things that others didn’t. Now I don’t mean I see the dead, I am no medium. But I have always been in connection with angels. I have showed you my angel orb pictures, they have always been near. I get messages. I listen, I hear, I believe. I have long used a pendulum to connect with God, spirit, my angels and guides. What all those years on medication did was dull my senses. I couldn’t see and hear the things I used to. I was on very little medication before the fire, and I was getting in tune with spirit again, that’s when my pink angel orbs were so present here, always, I have hundreds of photographs of them. I would sit here and light a candle and be in communion with so much that was beautiful and full of light. The messages were very clear. I was getting really close to something. And then the fire happened. I was protected by the angels that night and then they disappeared as I wrote about yesterday. And with them went everything I knew about the light, and spirit, and a whole beautiful spirit filled world that I lived in close touch with disappeared.

I was highly medicated after the fire and continued on the meds for 4 years. And highly medicated there can be no connection with such light ethereal beings. There is so much more here than many people will ever see, hear, or imagine. It is as in Shakespeare’s Hamlet when he wrote, “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” There is so much more here, and I had lost it all. As I began to wake up again on the ketogenic diet, and then started reducing my meds, channels long closed began to open. I hear and see things again that I hadn’t in a long time and really never expected to again. And this is all just for me. It is not something I want to do with others, it is very private, but it is a kind of clarity that is almost startling and I now know requires far more sensitive an instrument than can be had steeped in medication. I am beginning to wake up to something, for something, and I don’t know what it is. I have intimations, but I am just staying open, discounting nothing, accepting what others would not because it sounds too crazy. Trust me, I know crazy. I am saner and clearer than I’ve ever been. And damn it feels good.

So, here I sit, finishing writing this and feeling that once again I may have said too much. Some won’t like it, and that’s okay. I completely respect and accept where others are. This is where I am.

I have now been working on this for hours, afraid to write what I wanted to write and then going as far as I dare for now. It’s enough. The transformation in me is so huge that it’s hard to assimilate. It’s kind of like that saying, “How do you eat an elephant? One bite at a time.” That’s all I can do for now and I don’t know where I’ll be tomorrow or next year but I can tell you that I am in a wonderful place, an incredible place, and I see a whole new world, many layered, than I ever knew existed. It is wondrous.

I will continue on, I will keep you posted. The marvelous thing is that now I know I’m not alone. That’s all I need to know for now. I am heading into a whole new life and I am ready for it.

The Experiment ~A 365 Day Search For Truth, Beauty &
Happiness: Day 1 ~ Introduction To The Project
“Do or do not. There is no try.”
Yoda

Comments

  1. That elephant is in disappearance mode, one toenail, one eyelash at a time. And you are emerging whole and strong.

    • Maitri, I don’t know what else to say but what Cathryn has — all good energy and health to you. Diet is so much more important than we think — and your post supports that.

    • Thank you both Cathryn and Lisa,

      It is a whole new world I wake up to everyday. I wake up smiling, excited and happy to greet the day. If you’d have told me a year ago I could feel this way AND be off my meds and all the rest I would have told you YOU were crazy! It just goes to show us that there is so much ahead of us that we can’t begin to see and we can’t be there until we’re there so we simply need to live as fully and as joyously and as well in each moment as we can. It’s the only way to live. And the better you take care of yourself and the more you love yourself the better the outcome will be. I am learning so many amazing things, I am in awe. Thank you both so much for being here. It means so much to me… <3

  2. never be afraid to express whatever is on your mind and heart. it’s your awesome multifaceted humanity that we love, maitri. if someone doesn’t like something you say, then that is their personal response, it has nothing to do with whether you DESERVE to share your fullness with us. YOU DO

    xo
    ka

    • Thank you so much darling Ka, it helps me so much to hear you say that because I was a bit nervous about sharing some of what I did, but I had to, I just really had to. So MANY things are waking up in me now and it’s all part of a whole, and not to share some parts of it wouldn’t be honest and in full disclosure which is what I aim to do here. So here I am and there you are and it feels good to be together with you here. Thanks so much for being here with me honey, it just means the world to me, and I love you…

  3. Yes Maitri, what other people think is their problem, how they see the world, not yours. I don’t think you are crazy. I love what you wrote. This is so exciting. I am looking forward to reading MORE about your angels and whatever you want to share.

    Love, Jean

    • Thank you so much dear Jean, it is so affirming to read what you’ve written and it means so much to me that you wrote it. As I said to Katya so MANY things are waking up in me now, I can’t share parts and not all because then you really couldn’t see the glorious picture that is evolving. It’s all such a wonder, and yes, my angels, they’re here with me now, as yours are with you. They are with us always which of course I don’t have to tell you. We just have to be awake and open to them and get very still and quiet. And you can’t reach them if you are numbed by something whether drugs, alcohol or prescription medications, especially of the sort I was on that affect your brain, you sense of awareness and ability to see clearly. There are so many things that are important, aren’t there? I’m sending you a big hug honey, and lots of love…

  4. Victoria SkyDancer says

    Although I was attracted to parts of the Great Mystery when I was a wee sprite, I didn’t open my Treasure Chest of gifts and talents until my late twenties. Once I did, though, I made up for lost time. 🙂
    I realized something while doing my Step-Work: I had built my spiritual house in times of plenty and ease. Now, in the Crucible, when all is melted down to make new forms, I am invited to see what remains, and what I can still do.
    I also see that I have a choice: I can listen to the Stinkin Thinkin of my Stuckness in the Abyss, or I can swim to the surface and gain Clarity and Inspiration in Light-filled waters. Though the former remains tempting, I am course-correcting more and more towards the surface. Save me a floatie. 😉

    • Ah Victoria love, you are surely a Phoenix Rising. There is much on the horizon for you and it is bright and beautiful and will be transformative. I’m so excited for you. AND I’m saving you a seat right here next to me! Right on Sister! Let’s DO this!

      I love you sweet V. Rock ON! 😀

  5. Jean is right, Maitri. This is YOUR life, YOUR experience, YOUR angels. Please share as much or as little you want. LOVE, Memarge

    • Thank you so much darling Marge, I appreciate your kind, supportive words so much and it’s so good to see you here. Blessings and love to you dearheart. May you be blessed…

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