The Experiment: Day 54 ~ What To Do When You Feel Lost — A Concrete Plan…

Do you feel lost right now? For any reason. I want to share something with you.

I have been counseling someone today that is going through a very hard time and feels lost and scared. This is what I told her to do, and this comes out of 40 years of teaching a very healing journal class, and many years of mentoring. It works, and if you are feeling lost right now there’s no time to waste, you need to be found, you need to gain clarity, you need to have something concrete in hand that can be your touchstone through these days, you need to find your North Star, and do you know what? Your North Star is already there, inside you. I am very serious. Begin here.

Get a notebook or journal, get something big enough and spacious enough that you can write and draw out your feelings, and something that is very comfortable to cozy up with, you are going to be spending a lot of time here in the days, weeks, and months to come.

Make 2 columns. At the top of the left hand column write this down: “These are the things that I know for sure…” In the right hand column write, “I don’t know…” Begin by writing anything and everything you know in this moment to be true, and write down the things you don’t know. They can be very small things. They can be huge, life-altering things, but you are going to write down one thing at a time, it’s okay to skip back and forth between the two columns. You might start, in the first column, by writing, “I know that I am okay in this moment.” Do not linger in the past or project into the future. When you are lost there are 2 things you know for sure. You know where you are in this moment, and you know that from this moment all you have to do is the next right thing. That is all. One moment follows another. Don’t try to make giant decisions about your future, make decisions about today, about this moment. If all you can think of is “I need to buy dog food today” write that down. Buy the dog food. One task completed makes you feel stronger. Every new thing you know you know for sure makes you stronger, it gives you a place to begin from, just be right there, present, in that one moment and do the next right thing.

Keep adding to each column. You may find that things switch back and forth from one column to the next. That’s fine, it’s the natural order of things, the organic way life works, you will know and then you won’t know. You won’t know and then you will. Every day just keep adding to these lists. Read your lists every day. Know exactly where you are in this moment. Take care of this moment and the next will naturally follow. You are on your way.

If you are a visual person you can make little drawings or doodles along the way. You can do a collage. Collage is an amazing thing because you just start randomly cutting out pictures, words, and phrases and gluing them down. You can do this in your journal or on colored construction paper. You can hang these collages up where you can see them often or you can glue them in your journal. You could write,
“I don’t know what to do about _______” at the top of a page and then draw or collage images, words and phrases that appear. You may be amazed where you go with this. When you begin to write things down, or draw, or collage, it can be eye opening, and the magic of writing is that things you thought you didn’t know, well, the answers are often already there inside you and they are revealed as you write. It’s like the old Magic 8 Balls, you ask a question, turn the ball over, and watch the answer slowly drift up through the murky depths. This will happen for you. When you’ve written as many things as you can on each list choose the one(s) that are really potent for you in this moment. Write down, “I know this to be true…” and write about that one thing for 10 minutes. You will be amazed what comes up. Then write down one of the things that you don’t know and go with that. Do not stop writing for 10 minutes, keep your hand moving no matter what comes up even if it seems confusing or nonsensical, just keep writing. You have begun to Peel The Layers Of The Heart (That’s what I called my journal classes for many years.). Do this everyday. When you sit down with morning coffee right off the bat add to your lists. Choose one from each list and write about it for 10 minutes each. You don’t have to linger, you can write about these things and close your notebook. What you have written will simmer in your subconscious. Things will unfold, things will be revealed. Stay in the present moment, all you need to do is to get through one moment at a time.

These exercises are simple, but as more and more is revealed, as you get clearer and clearer about where you are you will begin to know what you need to do, one perhaps tiny thing at a time, remember, just do the next right thing. That’s all you have to do. There is magic in that, it works miracles, it moves you forward and that forward momentum will empower you to keep moving forward. I promise you, this works.

If you are feeling lost today perhaps the next right thing you can do is to get your notebook, and write those 2 things at the top of the page — “I know this for sure” and on the other side “I don’t know.” Don’t put any pressure on yourself, be very gentle with yourself, things will begin to come up and you will write them down. Carry this notebook with you, it is your partner on the journey before you. Step by step what you need to know will be revealed. In this moment that’s all you need to do.

It is so important to make concrete steps and not just let yourself get lost in the morass of your mind. Writing things down is very powerful and will take you to places you can’t imagine in this moment, but all you have to do is write one thing down at a time, keep at it, and as the knowing arises inside you what that next right thing is, take that step. That single step. It’s enough for now. It will be enough each day. Start right now. Don’t waste another moment.

I am here with you, write to me in the comments and I will answer you. If you need a mentoring session you can contact me, but for now just get your notebook and start to write things down. It’s your first step on the path to finding your way, and it works. Don’t wait another moment, do it now.

With warm love, and absolute belief in you, and the knowledge that you will surely, one moment at a time, be okay…


The Experiment ~A 365 Day Search For Truth, Beauty &
Day 1 ~ Introduction To The Project
“Do or do not. There is no try.”